Thursday, July 2, 2009

FSJ has become again the FSJ we knew all along! Yes!

I must say, ever since a moron reporter, whose name is long burried and forgotten, blew Daniel Lyons' cover as the blogger behind Fake Steve Jobs, his subsequent postings lost the quality level he maintained for so long when he was hidden behind anonymity. It was during then that he wrote his best pieces, many have claimed. In the period between the blow of his cover, his closing down the FSJ blog, and his move to a far less successful Real Daniel Lyons blog, and eventually his decision to cease blogging altogether in order to protect his job at Newsweek and continue to "earn a living to feed his wife and kid", as he himself put it, those stories were written in a style and energy level far... waaay far below what we were used of him as FSJ.

His latest gig to revive the FSJ blog all over again though, after His Jobness's liver tranplant news hit the public few weeks back, is quite promising nonetheless. Reading his very last posting really, really made me LMFAO until I got short-breathed. Some excerpts are just as good as it gets:

...One thing you hacks need to realize is that yes, our marketing and PR people receive training in how to spread fake stories, but guess what? Engineers don't even need that training. That kind of shit comes naturally to them...

...Steve, while hospitalized in Tennessee, fired several hospital employees who could not satisfactorily answer the question, "What do you do here?"...

And my personal favorite:
...By the way, Forbes reporter -- we know your name. We know your home address. We're working on getting your medical records. Keep this up and I swear to friggin God we will go nuclear on your ass and publish all of it. I know what you're thinking. You're thinking I'm weak, I'm vulnerable, I'm having someone drive me to work and I need people to open doors for me. And so you think maybe you can push El Jobso around a little bit. Well, go ahead. Try it. Seriously. I dare you. I double-dare you. Fuckwit. I will crush you like the bug you are...

You need to go read the whole thing though. And keep on laughing until your underpants drop off from you piss-wetting 'em.

Dear Dan, welcome back, pal. U R simply the best!

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