I'm watching CNBC live this Monday pm, you know, the financial network... first of all, why do Americans pronounce the 'neur' in 'entrepreneur' like the 'ure' in 'manure'? Just being curious...
Anyways, that's not the subject of my crankiness this afternoon. I just heard the anchor present some dude from Unilever, the consumer products behemoth, who was like, 'our highly talented people... who will leverage on our strengths... and will emerge from this crisis as winners by showing great leadership... bla...bla...bla...' If I got a cent for every time I heard a pitch like that I'd be filthy rich by now. Do these people actually believe what the're sayin'? I mean, if there was so much talent in their shops, would their stock still go down the tube the way it recently did? C'm on, folks. This whole oratory sounds like Webster's definition of self-deception: faking an orgasm while masturbating! Got it?
In every company I worked for (many US HQed among them) I often heard bosses talking about 'our highly talented people'. Always they sounded like we were the unique ones with excessive 'talent' in overdrive whereas each and every one of our competitors sucked! Know what? The worst of all was that many among the troops needed that stroking to enjoy their version of professional fullfillment. Get serious dude... really! Why do bosses do that? Almost always, average leaders will deliver 'stroking' opium to the subordinate masses to be seen that it's actually them who have been capable indeed, in the first place, to have assembled all that unique 'talent'... aiming to achieve "the company's long term strategies for the benefit of the shareholders!" Horseshit! What a pile of monumental horseshit! Wow! They're really good these characters! Especially as they manage to walk away with multiple millions in annual pay and related bonusses.
Am I so cranky about them buggers because of some sort of jealousy? Nay... not that at all! Been there done that! I had my fair share in playing similar leadership roles myself for some time (albeit without the multiple millions bit, rather hundreds of thousands instead) and, as I go back in memories I can't help seeing myself delivering that type of bullshit to my troops, then, too. Worst of all, I didn't realize the size of 'orgasm faking' I was also indulging into. I'd be dead ashamed for sure if I time-traveled back to those days and heard me pitching horseshit like this. Whatever...
Here's the thing. Yep, there's huge talent out there. Those rare souls who changed our lives via their inventions and advancement of the arts, science and technology in the last three thousand years. Like Confucius, Plato and Aristoteles. Like Newton, and Bacon... Maxwell, Darwin, Einstein and Feynman. Callas and Bob Dylan. Pattie Maes and Steve Jobs to mention a few geniuses in our days. Even Bill Gates for that matter, but... not that Monkeyboy Ballmer. That one is the stereotype of a bullshitting leader instead, fooling himself about his company's bottomless 'talent' reservoir of myriads of Mandarin bureaucrats he's attracted to the safe MSFT haven, to have them enjoy a stressless and balanced family and professional life until retirement. How cool is that?
I could go on for ever... Anyways, beware of your leaders' palabras agudas, folks. If you know what's good for you...
Anyways, that's not the subject of my crankiness this afternoon. I just heard the anchor present some dude from Unilever, the consumer products behemoth, who was like, 'our highly talented people... who will leverage on our strengths... and will emerge from this crisis as winners by showing great leadership... bla...bla...bla...' If I got a cent for every time I heard a pitch like that I'd be filthy rich by now. Do these people actually believe what the're sayin'? I mean, if there was so much talent in their shops, would their stock still go down the tube the way it recently did? C'm on, folks. This whole oratory sounds like Webster's definition of self-deception: faking an orgasm while masturbating! Got it?
In every company I worked for (many US HQed among them) I often heard bosses talking about 'our highly talented people'. Always they sounded like we were the unique ones with excessive 'talent' in overdrive whereas each and every one of our competitors sucked! Know what? The worst of all was that many among the troops needed that stroking to enjoy their version of professional fullfillment. Get serious dude... really! Why do bosses do that? Almost always, average leaders will deliver 'stroking' opium to the subordinate masses to be seen that it's actually them who have been capable indeed, in the first place, to have assembled all that unique 'talent'... aiming to achieve "the company's long term strategies for the benefit of the shareholders!" Horseshit! What a pile of monumental horseshit! Wow! They're really good these characters! Especially as they manage to walk away with multiple millions in annual pay and related bonusses.
Am I so cranky about them buggers because of some sort of jealousy? Nay... not that at all! Been there done that! I had my fair share in playing similar leadership roles myself for some time (albeit without the multiple millions bit, rather hundreds of thousands instead) and, as I go back in memories I can't help seeing myself delivering that type of bullshit to my troops, then, too. Worst of all, I didn't realize the size of 'orgasm faking' I was also indulging into. I'd be dead ashamed for sure if I time-traveled back to those days and heard me pitching horseshit like this. Whatever...
Here's the thing. Yep, there's huge talent out there. Those rare souls who changed our lives via their inventions and advancement of the arts, science and technology in the last three thousand years. Like Confucius, Plato and Aristoteles. Like Newton, and Bacon... Maxwell, Darwin, Einstein and Feynman. Callas and Bob Dylan. Pattie Maes and Steve Jobs to mention a few geniuses in our days. Even Bill Gates for that matter, but... not that Monkeyboy Ballmer. That one is the stereotype of a bullshitting leader instead, fooling himself about his company's bottomless 'talent' reservoir of myriads of Mandarin bureaucrats he's attracted to the safe MSFT haven, to have them enjoy a stressless and balanced family and professional life until retirement. How cool is that?
I could go on for ever... Anyways, beware of your leaders' palabras agudas, folks. If you know what's good for you...
No comments:
Post a Comment